That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
