was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
whose parrot is this?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
pray to the hookup gods
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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