I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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