that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
