Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Randomize