come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
