So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
