Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Randomize
