sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
