Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
