new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
