I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
