You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
