haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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