she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
