she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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