Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
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