I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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