its not stalking. its research.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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