its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
