Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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