my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I wish I only lived at night.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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