Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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