I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
