Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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