I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
