I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
