Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
