and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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