someone get that fucking seahorse.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
