That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
