I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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