I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
only if we run a train.
done.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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