Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven