I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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