After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
