You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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