I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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