I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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