Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
you made out with another girl for some wings
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
