its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
