Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
whose parrot is this?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
