I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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