Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
