Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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