her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
