What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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