Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
