Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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