Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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