Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
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