It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Randomize
